שוב צריכה עזרה

Reutk

Active member
שוב צריכה עזרה

תיקון טעויות Dear biary I laying on the ground I don’t know where I am or how long I was lien here my face is wet so I was probably crying but I don’t care I am down caring and I'm not going to cry for him anymore. By him I mean my father I was just going down the stairs when I hared him and my mam ,they were tailking in the living room "why didn’t you get revived of this child while you could Goan do you have any idea how much this it cost me to raise him…". I never hear the rest of his words as I run down the stirs to the door and outside the house, I hared my mam screamed to me "Brian wait" but I didn’t stop I just keep running and running till I couldn’t move my legs anymore ,and then I crash to the ground . I always know he can be horrible sometimes a specially after coming home late and drunk from another " hanging out with the gays" . But I thought he at least loved me wanted me because he his my father he own my at least that right but I guess not. תודה
 

Athaclena

New member
יש כאן כמה בעיות

טעויות כתיב רציניות, ואת מחליפה זמנים באמצע משפט. Dear diary I'm lying on the ground I don’t know where I am or how long I've been lying here my face is wet so I was probably crying but I don’t care I am done caring and I'm not going to cry for him anymore. By him I mean my father I was just going down the stairs when I heard him and my mom ,they were talking in the living room "why didn’t you get rid (?) of this child while you could Joan do you have any idea how much it cost me to raise him…". I never heard the rest of his words as I ran down the stairs to the door and outside the house, I heard my mam scream "Brian wait" but I didn’t stop I just kept running and running till I couldn’t move my legs anymore ,and then I crashed to the ground . I always knew he can be horrible sometimes especially after coming home late and drunk from another " hanging out with the guys" . But I thought he at least loved me wanted me because he is my father he owes me at least that right but I guess not. הכוונת ל"למה לא נפטרת מהילד?"? GOAN זה השם של האמא? נראה לי JOAN זה כתוב נכון אבל אני גרועה בשמות. ובפיסוק לא נגעתי, צריך לפסק יותר ולהוסיף נקודות ופסיקים אבל זה את צריכה לעשות לדעתי. וזה גם לא כל כך קשור באנגלית. חוץ מזה זה יפה ומעניין, ואני מקווה שעזרתי לך.
 

Reutk

Active member
../images/Emo24.gifקודם המון תודה

וכן התכוונתי ללמה לא נפטרת מהילד והשם של אמא זה ג'ון
 

Athaclena

New member
יופי... קצת דאגתי

אני לרוב די טובה בלפענח דברים כאלה. NO OFFENCE אבל קשה להבין מה הכוונה אם יש טעויות כתב רציניות. הייתי ממליצה לך לעבוד על זה אבל אין לי מושג איך - אין לי בעיה כזאת...
 
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